The Parable of Jesus and Ford
IT'S LIKE THIS, A TRUE STORY. You know the Gospel of when Jesus rose from the dead on Easter. There was a big stone that was rolled away from his tomb, and Jesus walked out, thus completing the miracle of the resurrection and the promise of a Living God.
Now how did the Lord work that miracle? No, no, not bringing Jesus back from the dead, that's easy. Now, how did God work the miracle of moving the giant rock? Some say it was mystical forces of the spirit of the Lord. Others say it was alien technology.
But...
We think Jesus did it the right way. The latest evidence suggests that our Lord conjured up a Ford F-150 to help to roll away that stone. And we bet that Ronald Reagan was sent back to drive that truck and get that stone out of there. Reagan would have been just the man the Lord would call upon to saddle up and get the job done.
Now, we ask you to imagine what would have been, had you been the one sent back to rescue Jesus, and you had that tiny Toyota Matrix. Those little Japanese things can't push themselves uphill, let alone a giant bolder. You would have stranded Jesus. No wonder the Lord prefers American cars.
Jesus would have come back from the dead to be stuck in his tomb and there would be no miracle and we figure, no Easter. So think this over, while you enjoy your Japanese car. If it had been up to you, Jesus would still be pounding on the rock from the inside of his tomb. There would be no Easter Bunny. Your children would hate you and curse your name through their tears. Sure, Jesus would have forgiven you, once he got out, but would you even want the embarrasment?